- Gender
- Female
- Country
- United States of America
LaughLines w/ SusieQ™ Post ( week # 1 )
I hope to make you laugh, and put a little lift in your day. Once a week I will change the jokes and post a NEW LaughLines topic, closing the previous week. If you want me to continue please click the " LIKE " button
<·· Please do NOT spam jokes in replies ··>
<[ all jokes are made in jest, not meant to offend anyone]>
Why did the Blonde tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills
What is the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot?
Bigfoot has been sighted
What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back
Why did the blonde stare at frozen orange juice can for 2 hours?
Because it said 'concentrate'
To a blonde, what is long and hard?
Grade 4
A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces.
"Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."
Why did the blonde keep doing the backstroke?
She just had lunch and didn't want to swim on a full stomach
Did you hear about the blonde who tried to blow up her husband's car?
She burned her lips on the tailpipe
What's five miles long and has an IQ of 40?
A blonde parade
Why did the blonde put her laptop in the microwave ?
Because it " Froze "
How do you keep a blonde busy?
Put "Please flip over" on both sides of a piece of paper!
Why was the blondes' belly button sore?
Because her boyfriend was blonde too
Why was the blonde fired from the M&M factory?
Because she kept throwing away all of the W's
Why did the blonde stop using the pill?
Because it kept falling out
Why did the blonde put her iPad in the blender ?
She was trying to make apple juice
What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios ?
" Oh look ! Donut seeds ! "
What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home ?
She moved !
Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink ?
Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables !!
What do you get when you put two blondes in the freezer ?
Frosted flakes
How can you tell when a fax has been sent by a Blonde ?
There is a stamp on it
Why do Blondes have "TGIF" written on their shoes ?
Toes Go In First
What do you call a Blonde between two brunettes ?
A mental block
What do you call a fly buzzing inside a Blonde's head ?
A Space Invader
What does a Blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is on ?
" It's on, It's off, It's on, It's off, It's on, It's off "
Why did the Blonde scale the chain-link
fence ?
To see what was on the other side
Laughter connects us as people , laughter has no foreign accent. . .
Each of us has a spark of life inside us, and our highest endeavor should be to set off that spark in one another. It connects us all and joins us in happiness, even if only momentarily. Live happy, laugh long, laugh hard.
Best Regards,
SusieQ™
If you enjoyed my " LaughLines " and want it to continue, please tap the " LIKE " below
Tap here for week # 2 jokes
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=7773&p=78737#p78737
I hope to make you laugh, and put a little lift in your day. Once a week I will change the jokes and post a NEW LaughLines topic, closing the previous week. If you want me to continue please click the " LIKE " button
<·· Please do NOT spam jokes in replies ··>
<[ all jokes are made in jest, not meant to offend anyone]>
Why did the Blonde tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills
What is the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot?
Bigfoot has been sighted
What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back
Why did the blonde stare at frozen orange juice can for 2 hours?
Because it said 'concentrate'
To a blonde, what is long and hard?
Grade 4
A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces.
"Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."
Why did the blonde keep doing the backstroke?
She just had lunch and didn't want to swim on a full stomach
Did you hear about the blonde who tried to blow up her husband's car?
She burned her lips on the tailpipe
What's five miles long and has an IQ of 40?
A blonde parade
Why did the blonde put her laptop in the microwave ?
Because it " Froze "
How do you keep a blonde busy?
Put "Please flip over" on both sides of a piece of paper!
Why was the blondes' belly button sore?
Because her boyfriend was blonde too
Why was the blonde fired from the M&M factory?
Because she kept throwing away all of the W's
Why did the blonde stop using the pill?
Because it kept falling out
Why did the blonde put her iPad in the blender ?
She was trying to make apple juice
What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios ?
" Oh look ! Donut seeds ! "
What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home ?
She moved !
Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink ?
Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables !!
What do you get when you put two blondes in the freezer ?
Frosted flakes
How can you tell when a fax has been sent by a Blonde ?
There is a stamp on it
Why do Blondes have "TGIF" written on their shoes ?
Toes Go In First
What do you call a Blonde between two brunettes ?
A mental block
What do you call a fly buzzing inside a Blonde's head ?
A Space Invader
What does a Blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is on ?
" It's on, It's off, It's on, It's off, It's on, It's off "
Why did the Blonde scale the chain-link
fence ?
To see what was on the other side
Laughter connects us as people , laughter has no foreign accent. . .
Each of us has a spark of life inside us, and our highest endeavor should be to set off that spark in one another. It connects us all and joins us in happiness, even if only momentarily. Live happy, laugh long, laugh hard.
Best Regards,
SusieQ™
If you enjoyed my " LaughLines " and want it to continue, please tap the " LIKE " below
Tap here for week # 2 jokes
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=7773&p=78737#p78737